You're Not in Trouble

Soothing this scared part

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You are not in trouble.

They are not secretly mad at you.

You are inherently good.

You are safe.

If these words feel like medicine to you, maybe you consider yourself to be a people pleaser. Maybe you fear that you’re secretly a bad person, and ruminate on what people think of you. Maybe you avoid conflict out of fear, don’t set boundaries, say yes to too many things and then feel secretly resentful about it, morph yourself to match other people’s personalities so that we’re well-liked, and silence your needs to prioritize everyone else’s. Maybe you’ve spent so long agreeing to everyone else’s preferences, that you no longer know what you like or want. Your intuition has been blocked by the noise of everyone’s opinions.

You are so not alone in this feeling. For those of us that tend to be more people-pleasey, the deeper inner experience tends to be that we’re so scared of being seen as ‘bad,’ so we do everything in our control to be seen as ‘good.’

This may sound like self-sabotage, but it’s important to understand that this is actually self-protection. Or rather, maybe it was self-protection at one point in our lives, like early childhood, in a tumultuous relationship, or just surviving in this society that applauds, rewards and promotes self-neglect.

Healing this pattern of people pleasing means acknowledging that there’s a part of us that feels scared, and this part is attempting to protect us. Healing happens when we can cultivate a relationship with this scared part and relate to it with compassion and understanding, I know that was scary. Thank you for working so hard to protect me, but you don’t need to be on guard all the time. I’m the parent now and I’ll take care of you. You’re safe now.

An offering

If this resonates with you, I’m hosting another round of my People Pleasers Workshop! Join me on Sunday, July 30th at 11am PT for this 2-hour Zoom workshop, where I’ll guide you through the root of people pleasing and how we can begin to heal the pattern. I'll teach you tangible tools to integrate into your everyday life so that you can live more peacefully and aligned.

If you aren’t able to join in real time but still want to watch it, all ticket-buyers will receive a recording of the workshop via email!

I first hosted this workshop back in May, and was in awe of how many people it resonated with. I am so honored that it has supported you on your path, and I hope will continue to support you as you integrate these learnings.

This workshop includes…

• a digestible presentation on why we people please and how to heal the pattern

• a guided meditation

• a guided visualization exercise

• a journaling activity

• a live Q&A

• access to the recording of the workshop

You can sign up here!

Thank you for being here, exactly as you are. I cherish your existence and the hard work that you’re doing for your inner peace.

With warmth,

Meg